I was thinking about the discussion the other day about a Medium episode. Although it could be worthwhile I can see where it could also become a big beef session where we all complain and feel sorry for ourselves. There is already so much to complain about in the world anyway. Might be good to try to see what's also nice about Medium.
Yes, for sure. It looks like we will host this topic next Monday (the 12th) and you're right--we will need to do some framing around the intent of the conversation. It's not to bash. It's to mourn and let go, and move forward.
Ooh I loved Live. They played on the WWU campus when I was going there in '94. It was maybe my third or fourth concert ever, but they made me fall in love with live (har!) music. Can't believe you never revealed who the 2nd rockstar was even though you said you would.
I'd definitely say "my anxiety" but that's because it's been my main struggle since I was a toddler and has impacted every aspect of my entire life. Maybe it's not good to identify with it, but it's so interwoven in my mental experience that I would not be the same person without it. But I can see one reading of that terminology actually providing *more* distance from identity, because the anxiety is a separate thing that you "own", it isn't actually you.
I don't think claiming an asexual or demisexual identity paints one into a corner at all. Most of the younger generation who are taking on these identities are also the ones who feel the most like sexuality and gender can be fluid over time or with more self-knowledge. They're ok with allowing and accepting that it can happen. I'm genuinely puzzled why you say how difficult it can be to change identities when you saw that with your youngest child and her classmates, right? I think it's awesome this generation to understands that there are many valid ways to be human, unlike when we grew up. But you both talk at the end of the episode about identities being mutable, so you're not saying it's impossible. I think it probably would have been more difficult when we were growing up, but the culture has shifted, and now even oldies can try on new labels that may or may not stick. Another Seattle late-blooming nonbinary here, hi.
I call myself (as a minor proclivity, not in any way as important as my bisexual identity) demi-adjacent simply because it's totally foreign to me to be sexually attracted to random people on the street, or even celebrities, until they have sparked some strong emotion in me. I need more than just the visual appearance. And once that spark happens, it really doesn't matter what they look like, I'm all in. But maybe pop culture has lied to me all these years and this is how most people work.
I was thinking about the discussion the other day about a Medium episode. Although it could be worthwhile I can see where it could also become a big beef session where we all complain and feel sorry for ourselves. There is already so much to complain about in the world anyway. Might be good to try to see what's also nice about Medium.
Yes, for sure. It looks like we will host this topic next Monday (the 12th) and you're right--we will need to do some framing around the intent of the conversation. It's not to bash. It's to mourn and let go, and move forward.
Ooh I loved Live. They played on the WWU campus when I was going there in '94. It was maybe my third or fourth concert ever, but they made me fall in love with live (har!) music. Can't believe you never revealed who the 2nd rockstar was even though you said you would.
I'd definitely say "my anxiety" but that's because it's been my main struggle since I was a toddler and has impacted every aspect of my entire life. Maybe it's not good to identify with it, but it's so interwoven in my mental experience that I would not be the same person without it. But I can see one reading of that terminology actually providing *more* distance from identity, because the anxiety is a separate thing that you "own", it isn't actually you.
I don't think claiming an asexual or demisexual identity paints one into a corner at all. Most of the younger generation who are taking on these identities are also the ones who feel the most like sexuality and gender can be fluid over time or with more self-knowledge. They're ok with allowing and accepting that it can happen. I'm genuinely puzzled why you say how difficult it can be to change identities when you saw that with your youngest child and her classmates, right? I think it's awesome this generation to understands that there are many valid ways to be human, unlike when we grew up. But you both talk at the end of the episode about identities being mutable, so you're not saying it's impossible. I think it probably would have been more difficult when we were growing up, but the culture has shifted, and now even oldies can try on new labels that may or may not stick. Another Seattle late-blooming nonbinary here, hi.
I call myself (as a minor proclivity, not in any way as important as my bisexual identity) demi-adjacent simply because it's totally foreign to me to be sexually attracted to random people on the street, or even celebrities, until they have sparked some strong emotion in me. I need more than just the visual appearance. And once that spark happens, it really doesn't matter what they look like, I'm all in. But maybe pop culture has lied to me all these years and this is how most people work.
And to hope that things will improve! Do a sage burn, say a prayer, and look forward to better times.